Fear of an Intelligent Man...

During a conversation with one of our male friends the question came up about why women say they want an intelligent, successful man that has his life together, but settle for a thug who ain't about nothing instead of giving the man (who is trying and struggling to get his life right)a chance?? All 3 of us said that's not really use, but there are a lot of woman who are about this. Why do we do this to ourselves and the men who we really want for companions. We complain complain complain about how we can't find a good man, get a "bad boy" and just take what he dishes out. Then as we grow tired of his acts and immaturity we start to complain about him. Then the so-called "Mr. Right" we are looking and dreaming of comes along we don't know how to either break him down to feel like nothing or shit all over the relationship if it even gets that far. I question the motives of women sometimes. You can not constantly complain about how there are no good men around, when all you date are immature, one step out of or damn near on their way to jail, no good, don't wanna work, living life for his self, priorities not together and probably never will be, "Oh I can change him girl in no time" Oh really!! You think you can change a man who has been like that for years. As a therapist in training I have learned in so many classes that behaviors can be changed but not personalities. As women we are quick to try and change a man's personality, but not focus on the behaviors that are causing the personality to continue to be the way it is. The only person that can change a personality is that person, not you boo boo. Women need to wake up and look at the men that are really out there, most of the time there is a good man in your circle of friends or you have meet before and you haven't given him the time or day because he drives a Honda instead of a Benz or Range. The same guy driving the Benz or Range is usually leasing it and living in an apartment or in a house full of roommates or with is moms. Some of yall might be getting offended and some might think this could be a lil on the male bashing side but its just real talk. I have been on this earth for 33 years and women and men continue to have this conversation all the time. With the way the economy is, wouldn't you rather have a man making his way from the bottom to the top of the ladder in the company than the man who can't even get passed filling out the resume?? We talk about how hard is to find a man, but are you really looking or being basic and talking the talk? Really think about and most of the time YOU are the cause for your self not finding "Mr. Right". I'm not saying to lower your standards, but honestly ladies some of those standards you don't even meet, so how could you really expect to find a partner to fill those "big shoes"?? Now, honestly I like a lil thug passion in my life. My man is from the projects of BK so he knows what's hood. But he always can break down and rebuild a computer without any formal training and keeps up with the news and politics and can hold a conversation. So Ladies, you can have the best of both worlds. You need to live your life with you eyes,ears and hearts open because you never know who will enter you life when you are willing instead of waiting for something that really doesn't exist... It's 2010 Ladies stop being BASIC!!
REAL TALK

SMOOCHEZ
RONI

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